God has helped me to realize that I have not been surrendered to Him. I have been trying to pursue golf because it is something I wanted to do. Although I did have righteous desires in it, I also had some unrighteousness, selfish desires too. God has helped me realize that I was trying to pursue golf, but I had not surrendered the results to Him. I was obsessed with the results that I wanted and was not surrendered to allow God to use the talents He has given me for His purposes, and to fulfill the plans that He sees as best, the plans that He has for me.
It is very ignorant of me to take the talents God has given me and then say, "Thank you God for these talents. I will use them in this particular way for you. I am not interested in using them in any other ways that you might have me to".
God has been helping me realize that it is okay to pursue golf as long as my priorities are straight. Golf must take a back seat to many other things in my life which are so much more important - namely God and the beautiful family He has blessed me with. So, He has taught me that it is okay to pursue golf as long as my priorities are straight, but with that said, my pursuit must be surrendered to Him. I should pursue excellence, however, I must surrender all results to Him. I must surrender where it takes me and what I do with golf. I must be seeking God for how He wants me to use the talents He has blessed me with. I have always wanted to be a successful tournament player, but if God wants me doing something else with my talents, then I have the responsibility to do that. And what a joy I know that will be because I am always most fulfilled when I am surrendered to God's perfect will. When God leads me away from my initial dreams toward something else, He is doing this out of love. I want what He wants because it is ALWAYS best, and will always lead to the greatest joy and fulfillment.
Something else that God has been teaching me, and I find this so exciting, is the fact that in the past I wrongfully attempted to find joy in my pursuit of golf, but now, god is calling me to put that passion into priorities which are so much more important. I am excited to put that passion into loving and serving God, growing with Him and seeking opportunities that He leads me to to minister for Him and spread the gospel. Also, loving and serving my family, raising my beautiful children, growing with and supporting my gorgeous wife - these are priorities that are so much more important than pursuing the "possibility" of becoming a professional golfer. Even as I type this, I am more excited to pursue these things than I ever have been about pursuing golf. The reason for this is because to pursue golf has an element of selfishness in it. By pursuing things in a way which keep my priorities straight, that brings peace because I am aligned with God and His Word.
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